Lately you have all been working on S-N-T (show-not-tell) writing. It is always helpful to SNT in your stories because it makes them stand out and hook the reader. Your assignment this week is to take 2 telling sentences from a story you have been working on (including quickwrites) and make them show sentences.
A telling sentence would be: The Rockers are the best band ever.
A showing sentence would be: The Rockers have sold more records than any other band in history. They have been on the cover of all of the famous magazines and have millions of fans.
telling #1- One rainy day I just sat there on the couch.
ReplyDeleteTelling #2- After that I shut down my computer.
Show #1- On one rainy day I sat down on my squishy, itchy brown couch that was at my home for 10 years! It is so uncompterable it will ne the worse couch to sit on!
show #2- When I was done on my computer I shut down the computer then I pushed the red big buttom BROOM...then I went downstairs to eat dinner.
Telling#1:It was stormy.
ReplyDeleteShowing#1:It was a dark and stormy night the batman sign was in the sky I knew something bad happend...
Telling#2:It was hot.
Showing#2:It was steaming hot I did'nt know what to do...so I got some water.
1# telling, an ice cream sandwich
ReplyDelete1# showing,soft sugar cookies on the top filled with vanila ice cream and puffy white marsh mellos
2#telling,my summer was fun
2#showing,the hot blazing sun shinning on my skin but with a bucket of ice cold water i dumped on myself i was able to keep myself cool
Telling #1-I had the ball
ReplyDeleteshow #1- when i had the big green ball it fell on to my face BOOM... it hurt so bad my mom gave me ice the bag hade a hole the cold water fell on to my face.
Telling #2- I went home
Show #2- I ran so fast i could fell the cold blast of wind as it came though me. my backpack whent up and down with the books going down so hard.
telling#1 my dog is funny.
ReplyDeleteshowing#1 one time my dog ate penut butter and it got stuck to the top of his mouth he couldnt gdt it off.
telling#2 i heard my granpa cooking steak.
showing#2 i coud hear my grandpa cooking steak on the grill when im in the back yard talking to my friends.
tell #1-It was a rainy day
ReplyDeletetell #2-I had a fun time atthe beach.
show#1-It was thundering outside I peered out the window there was puddles of water and trees that were falling off.
show #2-Splash!My knees were scraping against the hot burning sand.A wave was coming up!Splash the water poured against my skin.
telling#1
ReplyDeletetoday i went to the lybrary
telling#2
i had fun day
showing#1 i was realy bord and i went to this place it had a lot of books it was the best.
showing#2
it was the best day of my life i went to the asomest skate park in the world wear i can do what ever iwant and there was food stands all over the place
Telling #1:It was a dark and stormy night.
ReplyDeleteTelling #2:Yawn! i was sleepy.
Showing #1:it was a pitch black night it was raining it made leaks in my celeing i felt water dripping then BOOM! lightning
Showing #2:Yawn! *sigh* i wish i could sleep in a soft comfertable bed with pillows size of my head and matress big as a whale.
TELL#1 I like creeks.
ReplyDeleteTELL#2 Jumping off diving boards is fun
SHOW#1 Steping threw mud branches and dont forget antpiles,vvrrrrrr the waterfall is cold but still fun to swim in!
SHOW#2 Tip toe on the diving board I go jump jump I did a flip in the air and landed in cold water
telling #1 once there was a boy named Will.
ReplyDeletetelling #2 i broke my arm.
showing #1 Will had magic powers his mission was to find the 6 powerful stones
showing #2 i was in PreK it was mothers day i went on the monky bar and fell.i was crying a lot.i went to the hospital and figured out that i had a broken arm.
tell:it a hot day
ReplyDeleteshow:it a hot day but i'm play in the playground 1hourlater... i say"no,no,no" because my face is hot potato
Tell#1 One day i was hunting in Tenessee.
ReplyDeleteShow#1 It was 15 degrees and I was cepping my eyes pealded for 145 pound bucks as my fingers were freezing cold holding the stock
of my rifle.
tell: I found a pencil.
ReplyDeleteshow: I found a pencil from floor that looks like stick and cheetos.It's red.It feel like plastic, color looks like red folder.That was the one that I just lost few days ago...
IT'S MINE NOW!!!!!
telling#1 it is so hot telling#2i lost my 1 tooth showing#1 it is blaysing hot ni'm driping sweet i'v ben outside for 7 hours. showing#2 AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I YELD i'm in pain as my tooth was being puld out of my mouth
ReplyDeleteTell#1:I let in a bad goal
ReplyDeleteShow:I see 12 ounce piece of rubber coming towards my face I make my move I try to stop it by raising my left (which is my glove hand) the piece of rubber banged aginst my wooden stick but then I realized that piece of rubber was at the back of the net.
Tell#1 One day i went to a texas longhorns game
ReplyDeleteShow#1 I went to a longhorns game a bunch of screaming fans cheer loudly for their heros the texas longhorns football team.I search the stadium for my seat but it was hard to spot through the sea of burnt orange.
Tell#2 Baseball is my favorite sport
Show#2 It was 90 deegrees outside i am up to bat. My bat is slippery from sweat. the crowd is going wild and i am feeling the pressure.
tell:a hot day
ReplyDeleteshow:The sweat drips down my face,and all I can Think is "Don't let your team down" I want to run inside,but the other team is about to launch the ball towards us,and I just know that my name is written all over that inflated pigskin......It's go TIME!!!!!
Tell #1- On April 6, 2009, Bendwood, Wildcat Way, and Rummel Creek were put on Lock Down because of a HPD pursuit in the area. All students and staff are safe. The pursuit was the result of an incident at the Home Depot. Two men had been breaking into cars, and a HPD officer shot one of them. They both fled to the Town and Country Area. Both are now in custody
ReplyDeleteShow #1- Today, April 6, 2009 (rewritng a story from the past), the students at Rummel Creek, Bendwood, and Wildcat Way were put on Lock Down after a breathtaking chase led them through the Town and Country area. Shattering glass was heard at the nearby Home Depot when 2 men broke in cars. A short, loud, scuffle ended in the injury of one of them men. The two criminals are now in custody. Dusters have prowled around looking for fingerprints. All sudents and staff are safe.
Tell#2- I went trick-or-treating.
Show#2- My hot costume dragged aloing the rough sidewalk due to the heaviness of my recently collected loot. when I was thirsty, I grabbed a slug from the refeleshing,cool water.
TELL #1: I ate a banana.
ReplyDeleteTELL #2: It was fun playing outside.
SHOW #1: I ate a yellow fruit that is so delicious.
SHOW #2: It was awesome playing with my friends under the HOT HOT sun.
Tell#1:A car speeding down the road.
ReplyDeleteShow#1:My cherry red ferrari is racing down the smooth,black road and while I open the sunroof I feel a gust of wind hit my face like someone is hitting me with a 50 pound weight.
tell #1: they were swinging.
ReplyDeleteshow #1: John and george the not-so-furry monkeys were swinging through the thin, leafy, Mike & Ike candy (R) green vines.
tell #2: i love to sing
show #2: oh i absulutely looooooooove to sing in the wet white showers, it's so wonderful!
Josh this was one of my favorite examples of turning a dull, "telling" sentence into a fantastic "showing" sentence. Well done young man and keep up the good work!
ReplyDelete